Porque Soy Mujer

Porque Soy Mujer

My hair was always perfectly braided

Like the Indian girl in our photo albums

Her pants neatly tucked into her boots

Her rifle the length of her torso

Porque Soy Mujer

When I danced my dress rose as high as the tide

I would curve my back

Let the waves of my dress drop down

And stomp my heels into the wood

Of the Theresa Champion dance studio

Porque Soy Mujer

I always had masa stuck under my fingernails

Which turned brown after some time of playing

Outside in the dirt like the Indian boy in our photo albums

 His face mysterious

A small tattoo penned on his right arm

Porque Soy Mujer

I earned my independence

By being left alone in a cheap efficiency

While my mother found love in the back

Of her brand new black and red T-Bird

The shiny paint glistened in the sun

As the Texas heat penetrated the leather seats

Porque Soy Mujer

My Guess jeans weren’t tight enough

To keep a boy from ripping open the button down fly

Leaving me by the San Antonio river banks

To lift up my blood tinged femininity

Porque Soy Mujer

I raised my fist

Graced the air with a finger in revolt

I was a revolutionary

Porque Soy Mujer

My child would remain unnamed

Like the Indian children in the photo albums

That my grandmother hid from us in a cedar chest

Infested with moth balls

Porque Soy Mujer

I swallowed a bottle of pills

I was too much of a coward to shoot myself

Or drown in a tub of my bright red blood

After pricking my wrists

Porque Soy Mujer

I woke up

Porque Soy Mujer

I became friends with

Joyce

Borges

Wolfe

And a fine glass of Malbec

Porque Soy Mujer

Wearing black reminded me of a night

I had stored in a box to wither and blister

Yet I wore it with pride

As I walked the University stage

To receive my college degree

Porque Soy Mujer

I am a mother

I am a creator

I am a no chinges con migo

O te rebiento la boca

I am my mother

Who searched for love

Because it is all that we have

I am my grandmother

Who taught herself to read and to write

Because words are as fierce as an army

I am my great grandmother

Who danced like the kickback of a rifle

Because we are revolutionaries

Porque soy mujer aqui estoy

Porque soy mujer

Aqui estoy